Thursday, January 29, 2009

Home is . . . where you sleep

Who says that home is where the heart is? I say that home is where the pillow, comforter, and (insert you favorite superhero in here) sheets, are waiting to greet you.

I have an apartment I call home. My bed there features flannel sheets, two comforters, and my new pillow. Occasionally it holds multiple throw pillows, when I actually make it, and several loads of laundry at a time, when I'm being counter productive. (The bed also features a cat, which lives under it, and on occasion condescends to meander at night, but only if I look the other way. That however is another story.) I call that home.
(note: cat is not really evil, just a bad pic.)

However, I often get home from work, grab my late night snack, and find myself to tired to make the climb up two flights of stair to my apartment. I then crash on my parents couch. (They have a guest bedroom, but there's another cat down stairs, and this one called dibs times infinity on the guest bed, so I get the couch.) My bed there features no sheets, but a blanket thrown underneath to insulate, a small throw pillow, which often smell of small dog, cat, or little kid, and the largest short blanket I can find. (What demented genius made all blankets just barely to short to cover your feet, no matter how you scrunch?) This too, I call home.

(See I'm not the only one who thinks its comfy)

But tonight, or rather earlier this morning, as I got off of work and my beautiful sister, and my gorgeous friend came to pick me up, nothing felt more like home, than walking onto the third floor of the girls dorm, which smelled of popcorn and feet, and pulling in my large swishy red inflatable mattress. And now I will cover it with a to short blanket, lay down on a tiny fuzzy throw pillow, pull up a spare quilt, and drift off to sleep (eventually) to the sound of the mattress rubbing against various pieces of furniture. And I feel quite at home. . . although it seems there should be a cat around here somewhere.

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

survival pack

"Come prepared"
These were the ominous words of my manager who called this afternoon to make sure that I would be able to make it in to work. She informed me that in the quite likely event that we would be snowed into the hospital, I should be prepared to stay. Bring an extra shirt, since you work tomorrow, and do you want me to put your name down for a bed . . . just in case? A hearty no thanks, for if I am snowed in I will not be able to sleep in the ER of University Hospital. No way.

So I packed my Survival Bag and headed in to work. (OK dad drove me in.)
My bag includes:
~Change of clothes, but no bed clothes.
~Contact kit
~2 slim fast shakes, (so that I can starve myself in an emergency)
~2 slim fast snacks, (ditto)
~A handful of Slim Jims (because it starts with slim, I pretend their healthy.)
~A large notebook
~A drawing book
~A compilation of all the work on a poem of mine, (big pile of papers w/scribbles)
~My moms copy of "The Complete Novels of Jane Austen" (really big book. with two fold purpose. I can read to entertain myself, or burn it to provide warmth if stranded, believe me, this book should burn for hours. {no one should put several books in one cover.})
~pencil/pens/and pencil sharpener

After I got to work I remember that I should have grabbed my phone charger. I'm sure as the night progresses I shall remember other things, which would have been useful. Snow shoes perhaps.

Now I have confirmed that Mom and Dad cannot pick me up, and am planning to stay with my wonderful sister Tiffany. But mother nature is fickle and we shall see how far I get.

Until my next post, enjoy your winter wonder land
Melissa Barr

Saturday, January 24, 2009

breaking with tradition

So I am now going to blog about things I did. I know that's sort of the traditional idea, but I dislike tradition.

#1 Tried to cook a healthy meal.

This meal included;
~grilled fish fresh from jungle Jim's.
~grilled eggplant, (they were cold and rubbery, so then we fried them and they tasted somewhat better, plus we were sure they were thoroughly dead.
~oven roasted red potatoes, (okay mostly, could have baked a little longer.)
~oven roasted green beans, (also fresh from jungle Jim's, and Letha helped me snap them.)

All in all . . . . . . . . . . well, fried food is just better.

#2 Enjoyed my day of warmth

~I wore a tee shirt all day, and refused to acknowledge that I was in any way cold.
~I walked my dog to the public library, where he howled at being tied up outside.
~Sat outside and tried to read, but couldn't get that into the book, what with its being ridiculous ~and two dogs tyring to lick me to death.

Finally consented to but on a light shaw when we went out that evening . . . and about froze every time we were outside.

#3 Turned my fire escape into a bird sanctuary

~bought large bag of seed
~added three new kinds of feeders, bringing my total to four
~added a wickerish? bird house.

now the large birds flock to the food, and scare away the small ones that use to be my regulars. Is there no happy medium?

#4 Fell in love with Mr Darcy . . . again

~stayed up late watching the 1980's BBC version
~watched the Keria Knightly version the next day
~ordered the Colin Firth version from amazon
~Ransacked the house trying to find a copy of the book, which I would have sworn I owned. but had to settle for my mothers (complete work of Jane Austen) version.

Haven't had a chance to really dig in and read, but I feel an all-nighter coming on.

#5 Accomplished little

~did not put my laundry away, but craftily gave the impression of progress by moving it from basket to chair to bed to basket to chair to bed. (will move back to basket tonight.)
~slept in late every day, even though I constantly set my alarm for 7:30 or 8:00.
~didn't study for my final test in bio on Tuesday
~didn't eat very healthy (since I was home more.)
~failed to finish packing away the rest of my Christmas stuff in the new containers I bought, or put away several of my new, unnecessary purchases.

Plan to continue accomplishing nothing until Monday

#6 Bought several unnecessary things.

~trash can (for my bedroom) tech an unneeded item, I had formerly been using a bucket, and I do have a large on a room away in my kitchen, but this was convenient.
~beta fish, definitely no nec. but it was good to have them, because on the day we got them, Dakota found out that his pet hamster, which he refused to hold but still referred to in conversation, had been dead for about a month. He easily transitioned from fur to scale. no tears shed. (two fish one for Letha on for Dakota.)
~golf clubs. found a whole set of fairly nice female clubs at a thrift store, and procured them for about eight bucks, (clubs, one club cover, matching bag, and even an umbrella? of well if I have a sudden desire to golf in the rain -- I'm covered.

Several other items too, but I won't list all of them.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

poll for the females

What would you rather be called by : stranger, coworkers, people you've met once, etc.

~Hey You.

I have realized over the past few months of interaction between complete strangers at my job that I really dislike being called Ma'am. I don't know why, maybe I feel old or patronized or something, but it just . . . irks me. Really.

what's been going around in my mind today

Frodo Baggins: I can't do this Sam.

Sam Gamgee: I know. It's all wrong. By rights we shouldn't even be here. But we are. It's like in the great stories, Mr. Frodo. The ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger, they were. And sometimes you didn't want to know the end. Because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened? But in the end, it's only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer. Those were the stories that stayed with you. That meant something, even if you were too small to understand why. But I think, Mr. Frodo, I do understand. I know now. Folk in those stories had lots of chances of turning back, only they didn't. They kept going. Because they were holding on to something.

Frodo: What are we holding on to Sam?

Sam: That there's some good in this world, Mr. Frodo... and it's worth fighting for.

Monday, January 19, 2009

quick quiz

OK today's questions.

#1 Which famous literary characters' alma mater has this motto.

~Draco dormiens nunquam titillandus - Never Tickle a Sleeping Dragon.

#2 Which motto/phrase sounds more like me?

~Cacoethes scribendi - An insatiable urge to write.
~Helluo librorum - A glutton for books. (bookworm)

#3 What is the average rainfall in the Amazon Basin?

~80in (6.5 ft)
~24in (2ft0
~234in (9.5ft)
~50in (4ft 2in)

Answer two correctly (on #1/#3 which aren't subjective) and your next journey to a far off country in search of a rare spice to save a dying member of a royal family with whom you have fallen in love, will be a success. Answer incorrectly and the second time you climb Mt Everest a yeti will throw you off.

Friday, January 16, 2009

More helpful Latin phrases

About food.

~Clamo, clamatis, omnes clamamus pro glace lactis - I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream

~Da mihi sis bubulae frustrum assae, solana tuberosa in modo gallico fricta, ac quassum lactatum coagulatum crassum - Give me a hamburger, french fries, and a thick shake

~Da mihi sis crustum Etruscum cum omnibus in eo - I'll have a pizza with everything on it

~In dentibus anticis frustrum magnum spiniciae habes - You have a big piece of spinach in your front teeth

~Machina improba! Vel mihi ede potum vel mihi redde nummos meos! - You infernal machine! Give me a beverage or give me my money back!

~Noli simul flare sobereque - Don't whistle and drink at the same time

~Omnes lagani pistrinae gelate male sapiunt - All frozen pizzas taste lousy

~Res melius evinissent cum coca - Things go better with Coke

~Sic friatur crustum dulce - That's the way the cookie crumbles

~Te audire non possum. Musa sapientum fixa est in aure - I can't hear you. I have a banana in my ear

About language

Bene, cum Latine nescias, nolo manus meas in te maculare - Well, if you don't understand plain Latin, I'm not going to dirty my hands on you.

Graeca sunt, non leguntur - It is Greek, you don't read that

Illiud latine dici non potest - You can't say that in Latin

Omnia mihi lingua graeca sunt - It's all Greek to me

Si hoc legere scis nimium eruditionis habes - Essentially it says, 'if you can read this, you're overeducated.'

Sola lingua bona est lingua mortua - The only good language is a dead language

Sona si latine loqueris - Honk if you speak Latin

Vah! Denuone Latine loquebar? Me ineptum. Interdum modo elabitur - Oh! Was I speaking Latin again? Silly me. Sometimes it just sort of slips out


~Braccae illae virides cum subucula rosea et tunica Caledonia-quam elenganter concinnatur! - Those green pants go so well with that pink shirt and the plaid jacket!

~Canis meus id comedit - My dog ate it

~Catapultam habeo. Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis, ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam - I have a catapult. Give me all your money, or I will fling an enormous rock at your head

~Certe, toto, sentio nos in kansate non iam adesse - You know, Toto, I have a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore

~Credo elvem etiam vivere - I believe Elvis lives

~Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt - When catapults are outlawed, only outlaws will have catapults

~Cum homine de cane debeo congredi - Excuse me. I've got to see a man about a dog

~Ducator meus nihil agit sine lagunculae leynidae accedunt - My calculator does not work without batteries

~Estne tibi forte magna feles fulva et planissima? - Do you by chance happen to own a large, yellowish, very flat cat?

~Feles mala! cur cista non uteris? stramentum novum in ea posui - Bad kitty! Why don't you use the cat box? I put new litter in it

~Fortunatus sum! Pila mea de gramine horrido modo in pratum lene recta volvit! - Isn't that lucky! My ball just rolled out of the rough and onto the fairway!

~Haec trutina errat - There is something wrong with this scale

~Interdum feror cupidine partium magnarum europe vincendarum - Sometimes I get this urge to conquer large parts of Europe

~Luke sum ipse patrem te - Luke, I am your father. (Star Wars)

~Mater tua criceta fuit, et pater tuo redoluit bacarum sambucus - Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries

~Non omnes qui habemt citharam sunt citharoedi - Not all those who own a musical instrument are musicians.

~Nonne de novo eboraco venis? - You're from New York, aren't you

~Obesa cantavit - The fat lady has sung

~Orbes volantes exstare - Flying saucers are real

~Quantum materiae materietur marmota monax si marmota monax materiam possit materiari? - How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

~Sane ego te vocavi. forsitan capedictum tuum desit - I did call. Maybe your answering machine is broken

~Si fallatis officium, quaestor infitias eat se quicquam scire de factis vestris - If you fail, the secretary will disavow all knowledge of your activities

~Sit vis vobiscum - May the Force be with you.

helpful latin phrases that everyone should know

Everything thats interesting has a motto. People, groups, schools, building. All good mottos are in Latin. Therefor, I needed a Latin motto. Not being very fluent myself, I decided to use old faithful, aka the internet. I found a great site, and will now share with you some of the phrases I deliberated on. I have to many to share at once so I will try put them in some kind of order. Keep two things in mind while reading.

#1 Revera linguam latinam vix cognovi - (I don't really know all that much Latin)

#2 Quid quid latine dictum sit, altum videtur - (Anything said in Latin sounds profound)

Things that make sense. (sort of)

~a fronte praecipitium a tergo lupi - a precipice in front, wolves behind

~acta non verba -actions not words

~ad maiorem dei gloriam - for the greater glory of God

~Cave ab homine unius libri - Beware of anyone who has just one book.

~Memento mori - Remember that you must die

~Nascentes morimur - From the moment we are born, we begin to die

~Proximus sum egomet mihi - I am closest to myself.

~Scribere est agere - To write is to act

~Tu fui, ego eris - What you are, I was. What I am, you will be

Random phrases

~age. fac ut gaudeam - go ahead. make my day

~Capillamentum? Haudquaquam conieci esse! - A wig? I never would have guessed!

~Cogito ergo doleo - I think therefore I am depressed

~Dic mihi solum facta, domina - Just the facts, ma'am

~Lapsus nivium! - Avalanche!!

~Mei capilli sunt flagrantes - My hair is on fire

~Non sum pisces - I am not a fish

~Pistrix! Pistrix! - Shark! Shark!

~Tu stupidus es - You are dumb

~Vacca foeda - Stupid cow

~Vacca, vacca, vacca - Cow, cow, cow

~Visne saltare? - Do you want to dance?

Thursday, January 15, 2009

ice floats

How do I know that God is real?
Because ice floats.
Because hearts generate their own electrical current.
Because snow hares turn white in winter.

I know God is real because the world spins around in circles, never to close and never to far from the sun. Because we live. The human body is the most complex thing imaginable, and yet it functions. I know God is real because the season change, and the moon fades away and comes back again. Because of the water cycle. Because of the bean plants growth.

How dare you tell me that the universe exploded into being? Uranus spinning backward on its side tells me differently. How dare you suggest that for billions of years the earth was covered in slime and you and I are the result of billions and billions of lucky evolvements. How dare you say there is no purpose to life when caterpillars can turn into butterflies?

Don't give me your "theory" and call it science. I shall have my "religion" and know it fact.

Because ice floats. Who but God would have thought of that?

(something that's been on my heart lately.)

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

I'm multi-tasking!!!!!1

Can you believe it? I have not only one blog to publish my randomest thoughts on, but now another to publish my random thoughts that ryhme!

infectious deiseases

They are all around us. There is no way to protect yourself completely, but knowledge is power so I give you the power - do with it what you will.

~A highly infectious disease transferred from one host to another verbally. You should be aware that you can get a serious case (I.E. singing loudly in crowded places) from someone only displaying minor symptoms. (I.E. humming quietly) The best protection from this disease is to fill your ears with cotton, candle wax, or cement. Other than that, stop trying to stop singing -- you only make it worse.

~Scores mild to high on the infectious scale, depending on the time of year. Most often carried by overly happy people, surprisingly it is most infectious when carried by "normally less jolly" folks. If you choose to protect yourself (amazingly some don't) the best way is to simply avoid contact with likely carriers. Extremist may choose to avoid human contact for the incubation period (again varied by the season.) If you do catch this disease studies show that taking a long drive at rush hour, or shopping at a busy superstore can cure some cases.

~Moderately infectious, most are especially susceptible to it at certain times(I.E. finals week, valentines day, when trying on clothes) some people are life long carriers, and some people are immune, generally you have built in warning systems that can keep you away from carriers, but if you do find yourself affected, we suggest going to a pet store and looking at puppies and kitties. (In the rare case that you get peed on or bitten, you have a sever case and should just avoid as much contact with every one, thing, and place until you feel better.)

~Not much is known about this disease, everyone sent to study it has come back bleary eyed, not remember much except that they had fun. The only preventative measure is to avoid going to see friends after 8:00 in the evening. (more susceptible people should set an earlier time limit)

~Mostly seen in women, it has two known causes. Being surrounded by overly skinny people, and trying on clothes (this can also lead to TheGrump. See above). We suggest eating a few pounds of chocolate. However others suggest looking on U-Tube for videos of skinny people falling off treadmills.

~Highly infectious. The best preventive is to surround yourself with those suffering from TheGrump and Dietamongus. Although research shows that a healthy case of Laffterr can actually prevent several other disease. If you do get a case you can't seem to get rid of, a long walk in a cemetery, reading the newspaper, or watching Old Yeller are effective cures.

~Non infectious, however can lead to Misinthropinism (see below). The best thing to do when around a person who has this disease is to remember that it is most often hereditary and they can do nothing about it. A few people with this have been cured over time by various means, but no one cure holds true for all patients.

~The "I Hate Everybody Disease" as common as the common cold, everyone gets it now and again. Usually it clears within a few hours sometimes lasting a few days. The best preventive is to try to limit your exposure to human stupidity. When you have this disease, do not socialize! Not only are you infectious to other people, but you prolong your suffering. Stay home and talk to yourself, only venture out when you are so bored you crave human contact.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

If your looking for reading material

Here are a few good/humorous/sad/ etc books, maybe something will strike your fancy.

Louis Lamour
He is my staple. When I find that I have no desire to read, I return to Lamour. His short stories are the right length for a time crunched reader, and even though the plots are predictable, and the heroes not so developed, it is still the old west, and the cowboys that America fell in love with. What Lamour does best perhaps is to describe the country, after all he travelled much of it at or just after this era. Here are some of my favorites.
~The Daybreakers (or any Sackett book)
~The law of the desert born. (not really a short read, but good)
~The Last of the Breed (my personal favorite, ironically, not about cowboys or the old west, instead Indians and the Siberian wilderness, a modern story about an air force pilot.)

Brian Jacques
This is what I read when I need it all, romance, adventure, mystery, and of course, talking rodents. If you can get past the fact that the characters are mostly mice, badgers, hares, moles, and a smattering of other woodland creatures, these books are a delightful read. Jacques began writing them so he would have something to read to the students at the blind school where he volunteered, so they are amazingly descriptive. In every book there is always at least one good feast, and his descriptions of the food will make your mouth water and make you wish you were a tiny mouse vegetarian. Another great thins about the Redwall series is that if you don't care to read them most of the books are on tape, and they have a full cast of British voices in varing accents so its wonderful to listen to. Some a the best:
~Martin the Warrior (I still cry every time)
~The Taggerung
~Rackety Tam
I have all of the books that have been released in paperback, and am happy to loan them to anyone wishing to read them.

T.A. Barron
I love his history of The Lost Years of Merlin, and they are my staple wizard books.
the set includes.
~The Lost Years of Merlin
~The Seven Songs of Merlin
~The Fires of Merlin
~The Mirrors of Merlin
~The Wings of Merlin

J. K. Rawlings
OK Its childish, but the flare is true. Some of us did die a little when we didn't get our Hogwarts letter. I'm not so much into these for the epic battle of right and wrong, the relationships or characters themselves, but I love the world she creates in these books. When you can make a hippogriff sound so plausible, and have me checking the woods for bowtruckles, you have made something truly magic. I love to immerse myself in this world.
~The Sorcerer's Stone
~The Chamber of Secrets
~The Prisoner of Azkaban
~The Goblet of Fire
~The Order of the Phoenix
~The Half-Blood Prince
~The Deathly Hallows

Lori Wick
Honestly, not a big fan, but this is on my re-re-reread list. I still laugh, cry and hope for a happy ending, which I get. Every time.
~The Princess

Agatha Christie
I admit, I have not read many of her books, or I've only read one, But it was great. I read read it every now and then to see if I can figure it out, and after two or three reads, I still miss the signs. Until the end. If your looking for a mystery, try
~Ten Little Indians

I Suppose that's all for now, but I'm sure I go home and look at my shelf and have a whole new list. However, now I must go,
A good book is calling my name, and I must answer the call.